Gentlemen: do we prefer blondes or brunettes?
Thankfully, one lady from Middlesex may just have helped us resolve this age-old quandary. Let us introduce you to the delightful form of 20-year-old Katie-Marie Cork - the half-English, half-Portuguese Page 3 Idol runner-up and proud owner of a 30F chest. And possibly the reason we can finally decree we don't prefer blondes.
Hi Katie-Marie. We can't stop admiring your, er, mane. Do you enjoy being a brunette?
Yeah, I'm really proud of being half-Portuguese - all the hot girls in Portugal are brunette. When I'm there, people assume I'm Portuguese - then I talk with a London accent!
So why are brunettes better than blondes?
Brunettes look more classy. Some blondes look a bit... "Essex". We're classy sexy! I might look innocent and sweet, but I'm not really - I'm a little devil. When I want something, I get it. And I tend to get away with everything! I'm really flirty and touchy-feely, but I'm a bit of a prick-tease, to be honest!
You said you're Portuguese. Are Portuguese girls as wild as we like to think?
When I was last in Portugal, me and my friends were up until 5am every night, dancing on the tables in a bar. It got so hot in there, we ended up taking our tops off, dancing in little hot pants and bras! The bar staff got the whipped cream out, squirted it all over us and got guys to lick it off!
Did any ladies get involved?
Ha! Not that time, but I did once turn on my boyfriend and his friends by snogging a girl friend. They all
got their camera-phones out and wanted to film it! I haven't gone any further than that yet - but if it came to the crunch, I would...
For now, back to the brunette issue. Would you ever move over to the bleached side?
No! I love my natural look. I'm happy with what God gave me.
Looking at the way your bra is struggling to cope with your assets, it seems you've been given quite a lot...
Ha ha! Yeah - He's given me a little bit too much!
We get the feeling you're not a fan of blondes. Who's the least attractive celebrity blondie?
All of them! Abi Titmuss is the worst - I can't stand her. She's one of these people who's famous for nothing.
I just don't understand that. And Chantelle Houghton from Big Brother annoys me. I met her once and didn't like her. She was being funny to the staff at a hotel I was staying in and she started giving me evils!
So as a member of the anti-blonde brigade, can you tell us a decent blonde joke?
A blonde is at home screaming. Her boyfriend comes in and says, "What are you screaming about?" "I'm pregnant!" she says. "How do you know?" he asks. "I've taken a test and I'm having twins," she says. "How do you know you're having twins?" he asks. "I've taken two pregnancy tests and they're both positive!"
Are there any blondes you'd like to welcome to Team Brunette?
I'll say Sam Cooke and Michelle Marsh. I've always seen her lightbulb blonde and it would be good to see her go darker.
But don't girls who change sides have a problem with cuffs not matching collars?
Most of the girls I've seen haven't got anything down there anyway, so it wouldn't matter!
PUB FACT: Katie-Marie's top five brunettes are Penélope Cruz, Angelina Jolie, Lucy Pinder, Vikki Blows and Cheryl Cole.
